Joyfear

The moment my daughter Deepshikha was born, I was filled with an overpowering joy, she was a living miracle! I was also filled with soul-trembling fear, here was a fragile new life, entrusted into my incompetent hands.
It was overwhelming, this mixture of two powerful emotions. 

‘Fear makes us feel our humanity.’ ~Benjamin Disraeli

And it turns out every single defining moment in my life has been filled with Joyfear, with a mixture of intense joy and intense fear into one ball of powerful emotions that both lift me up and make me see things clearly when I hadn’t before.

My first try on cooking was filled with Joyfear. I felt Joyfear when I took up job. Joyfear was there when I got married, when we moved out with nothing in hand, when I published my first blog, and in a smaller way every time I create something new and put it out into the world to be judged.

Having only joy is great. Having only fear sucks. But having both … that’s life-defining.

Do not shy away from Joyfear. Seek it out. Recognize it when you happen upon it.

Joyfear will change your life, and you’ll never forget the moment you find it.